Why There Is Division In Relationships!
Relationships can be a beautiful thing, but they can also be frustrating. One thing that can be frustrating is when you feel like you are going in a different direction than your partner. A primary cause to division in a relationship is when couples don’t share the same core values. Your core values come from your belief system or faith. When a couples core values don’t align; it is difficult to move in the same direction.
Imagine if what joins you in marriage is rope. You hold on to one end, while your spouse holds onto the other. In order for you to go someplace, you have to go in the same direction. If a couple has two different core values; they will often find themselves wanting to go in different directions. Sometimes in the dating/courting process people are willing to negotiate their values, because they want to impress the other person, or they are fearful of driving them away.
This is very dangerous and deceptive.
Continually compromising one’s values will cause built up resentment over time. This is because you will feel forced to live a life style you disagree with. You see this happen all the time when one desires to remain celibate, but eventually is pulled into a sexual relationship against their values. Another situation is when the feelings of infatuation wane, and so too their desire to compromise in order to impress. Both are strong willed; not willing to give up their ground anymore, and it results in them going nowhere.
God understands the union that ties people together in marriage. Therefore God desires that Christians date/court, and marry people who are in the same household of faith. Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness (2Cor. 6:14, NKJV)? When people ignore this standard they are willingly stepping into a relationship that will be divided. This makes relationships more complicated than they have to be. Don’t compromise your core values while dating/courting. Find someone who shares your values and faith. In doing so you will take steps together in the same direction.
Pastor Brian Wallace
Photo via Visual Hunt